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Character Profiles Wolf - May - Serena - John Lennon - Rex - Dark Lord Charles - Plump - Gregg - Jessie - C.C
"This adventure is gonna suck..." An adventurer seeking the random heroism only seen in the Legend of Zelda or Final Fantasy, Wolf is a pretty down-to-earth guy. He isn't at all outgoing, and the only things he really does is go on adventures, buys food and video games, and go to hockey games with May. After the adventure with May and Serena, and after Serena left him for the "muscle-bound idiot" Rex, Wolf was in a down point, to say the least. But May quickly got him out of that depression, and now it's nothing more than a distant memory.
"Maybe if we ignore her, she'll go away. Like the XFL or Kathy Lee Gifford." A huge hockey fanatic, her life pretty much revolves around it. Well, that and Wolf, her best friend/crush. So to get the best of both worlds, she usually drags him to the few games she goes to (any game not involving the Lightning is pointless in her opinion). Of course, living in Buffalo makes things difficult on her. She considers her sister, Serena, to be a huge pain, so it really ticked her off when she started dating Wolf, mainly because of her huge crush, but also because Serena has a tendency to treat boyfriends like game systems: disposable and easily upgradeable. And unfortunately, her fears came true, and Wolf was left crushed, with only May to help him.
"The bitch is back" May's cat-girl sister, though no one ever comprehended how or why May has a neko sister. But no one ever bothered asking either. Serena was much like many other younger sisters for a while, always trying to hang around with May and Wolf when they were much younger, but as she got older, she decided she liked boys alot better. Soon, she turned her attention back to Wolf, for reasons unknown, and the two started dating. Relationships are just a four-letter word to Serena, however, as she will drop any guy for another who is better (according to her terms). And that's exactly what happened to Wolf when Rex came around. Without the slightest regret, she ran off with him, leaving Wolf crushed and depressed.
"I buried Paul... I mean, cranberry sauce!" Founding member of the Beatles, he is often seen wandering about in Buffalo and it's Adventure Acres. Hey, it's a fictional comic people. Just because he died before I was born doesn't mean he can't be in this comic over 20 years after his death. Right? Normally seen eating pizza, he still denies that Paul McCartney is dead. But we all know he did it. What is his point in the comic? Maybe no one will ever know...
"He's really Darth Vader, but he doesn't want Luke to find him." Dim-witted, but physically perfect, he spends his time wandering, trying to become a henchman or find some other purpose in his life, after his previous lord was defeated. However, the henchman business was going out of style, and he refused to go to war (being Canadian and all). His luck soon changed when he ran into Dark Lord Charles, who needed help in getting revenge on Wolf. And it was perfect for Rex: finally have work, and maybe even get some in the process. It's a win-win situation. Or so he thought.
"...As soon as I find someone to do it for me, you will pay dearly..." Doesn't every comic need an idiotic antagonist? Well, here's ours: Dark Lord Charles. Chuck tries to use his Buffalo United Local Learning for Sociopaths & Hitmen Institute of Technology (or BULLSHIT for short) degree to be an evil dictator like his grandfather, Dark Lord Philip. Unfortunately for him, BULLSHIT degrees to not carry that much weight, not to mention he barely graduated in the first place, so he is left wandering the Acres trying to put together henchmen for his lair. After losing a battle to Wolf, he has sworn revenge. Too bad he's got a BULLSHIT education...
"Plump!" The obligatory cute pet to the female protagonist, he is pretty much a laid-back penguin, not a care in the world. He doesn't like fish much, though: he prefers hot dogs and root beer. Might not be too good to feed that to a penguin, but May does anyways. Can you say no to that face? He didn't fall off the face of the planet. At the time of this typing (7 comics into season 5), he had only been around for a week. Time moves pretty slow around here, y'know?
"Oh great, now the ominous shadow..." An accountant who is extremely cheap and pretty... weird. Pretty much everyone can't stand him, due to his perverted remarks, complete cold-heartedness, and of course the fact he smells funny due to working right next to a dump (told you he was cheap). He became associated with the crew when he tried to get some pizza at The Pizza-ria, but was an innocent by-stander of Wolf & Chuck's farfetched fight. But, as it was later revealed, he deserved everything he got thrown at him. Especially the hammer.
Jessie Shapier - Artwork "Surprise! It's a gun rack!" Gregg's ex-girlfriend, and appearantly she was the crazy one. Go figure, right? Anyways, she's a slightly obsessive person and, as is seen, she has horrible judgement in gifts. She tries to re-kindle the old flame with Gregg, but appearantly it got a little too literal, as some people with good taste in music blew up the Acro Arena where the Backstreet Boys concert they were attending was held. She is presumed dead.
"That'll be $15,000.50 please." Gregg's other ex-girlfriend... technically... and also May & Serena's other sister. Much like May, she is prone to senseless violence to solve her problems, thought she is usually more laid-back, and is a scholar as opposed to a sports nut. She worked her ass off to get back to Buffalo to try and re-unite with her siblings & Wolf. Unfortunately, she has the worst timing possible. And she regrets it so bad. |
"Wolf Keane", "May Harrington", "Jelly Bean Sniper", and all related characters are © 2003-2008 Shane McCarthy. (If you see anything from here on eBaum's World, it was stolen.) |
Wolf Keane - 
May Harrington - 
Serena Harrington - 
John Lennon - 
Rex Biceps - 
Dark Lord Charles - 
Plump - 
Gregg Sycada - 
C.C. Cooper-Harrington -